November 16, 2022

 

Today was a dark day for me. I had an early appointment for my last physical therapy visit and was discharged with positive results. The therapist was already aware of Sue's passing since it was mentioned in the notes from my 6-month physical yesterday (yes, it has been a busy medical week for me). She was very kind and understanding, but it's still very difficult to talk about. After the appointment, I returned home to the hungry White Dog Army. Lilly asked me what was wrong, and I just broke down. I went and laid on the bed, with Lilly, Zsofia and Diva joining me as I cried. They were very patient, and didn't demand breakfast, even though it was later than normal.

The pile of fur in the photo shows my support team comforting me. I talked to Sue about how much I missed her, about my PT visit, and told her I wished she could be here to experience life with me. I know she's watching me and comforting me, but I just miss her hugging me and telling me it will be alright. 

"Dad, we're here for you. You can rub our tummies and we'll cuddle up next to you. I know it's not exactly the same, but it does feel good, right?" asked Lilly. Oh, my sweet girls, you certainly make me feel better. I'm thankful for your kind comforts. 

Since the bed was quite full, Bailey, Opal and Roman rubbed up against the side of the bed in support. I slowly calmed down, and just lay there breathing in the warmth and love. After a while, we all stood up and I made my way into the kitechen to make breakfast.

This afternoon I had a construction meeting for a project at the Bureau of Indian Affairs. It's the final phase of a 5-phase project that has been in construction for over a year. Most of the phases were interior renovations, but this one involved the installation of a new chiller to increase air flow to the office spaces already completed. I only wish I could share this part of the project with Sue as I had with the other phases. She always let me ramble on endlessly while discussing the challenges inherent in the construction industry.