July 3, 2019

White Dog nodded sympathetically. "He is still so close to the edge. I agree with the decision to keep him on heavy medication until Friday so he can have maximum help dealing with the noise and challenges of the holiday...plus whatever else his demons are churning up."

Roman wants to be with us but seems confused and timid about boundaries. We are giving him space to try to regulate himself but are carefully orchestrating interactions and for the most part the White Dog Army seems to understand his fragility.

"Love and patience," both White Dog and Steve remind me. "He is coming from a hellish place. He, with our help, will find his way back.

Tears roll as I am reminded of the sequence in the movie "What Dreams May Come,"  when Robin Williams' character goes to hell to rescue the soul of his wife who committed suicide. I would do this in an instant if I could save Roman from his demons.

Time and love. That is what I whisper as I look over at a moment of respite for my anguished boy.