November 15, 2018

White Dog looked at him lying with quiet satisfaction on the couch. "Every time one of these days happens it totally makes me believe Roman is starting to get it." "More important," I said, "is that he is finding ways to battle his demons that are working."

Roman is our physical and emotional mess; he deals with a lot of factors that have left him with major issues and reactive behaviors. Together we all work hard every day to help repair and redirect our boy so that he will overcome his challenges and become trustworthy.

I have learned to read the subtle signals when Roman is edgy or feeling stressed. He shifts his eyes sideways and his body language is more closed. Those are signs to watch him carefully and to make sure the others give him understanding and wide berth. But it is a thin line because TOO much protection actually ADDS stress and he feeds off the change in tone.

At coffee time this morning, Roman lined up with the others but took a position at the end of the line and shifted a bit uncomfortably. He was well behaved but I could tell he had to think hard and focus to keep his manners. But he did and after curled up on the carpet to nap.

The rest of the pack was pretty active, coming and going through the room, barking at the windows; not threatening him but interrupting his peace of mind. He disappeared and when I went looking, I found him safely curled at the back of his nighttime crate, soundly sleeping. He made the decision on his own to remove himself socially to stay calm. When he came out later I let him know how proud I was of his choices.

I tensed at jerky treat time when Tizenegy met Roman in the tight confines of the doorway and then chose to bark at his brother about pecking order. As I moved forward in my chair and wrapped my hand around the squirt bottle, Roman hopped past Tiz and came to sit pressed against my leg...his trained position of safety. He did not curl a lip or utter a low response; in turn, I immediately cupped his face to let him know he made a good choice. He pressed harder and gently took his strip. The moment passed quietly.

We have no guarantees that these choices are now his hardwired response in the future. He may have a meltdown later today. But these signs, when they happen, remind us all that we have moved forward in at least adding these tools to his tool box.

Dr. Julia reminds me when I feel defeated, that each time Roman takes time to think before just reacting is a victory. A complete "cure" may take the rest of his life...or at least years...but we should embrace these moments and take hope. I thought f her words today and smiled a "thanks."

Bravo! Roman! Momma is impressed by your self control and so proud of your efforts.